Seventh Grader Announces Open Source Book Report

Stone Clements, a seventh grader at Washington Middle School, has launched a new open source book report project, and is looking for qualified readers, documentation specialists, beta testers, and editors to participate in the collaborative venture. (Read More on Humorality.com)

Fixing Government, Hold the Swiss Cheese

Our founding fathers established a nation based on the principles of individual liberty, guaranteed God-given rights, and the elimination of government tyranny. Unfortunately, that country was captured by the Swiss during World War I. (Read More on Humorality.com)

Genesis 1 For Atheists

In the beginning nothing created the heavens and the earth. Now the nothing was dark and void; it was really nothing. But then there was something hovering right in the middle of it. How about that! (Read More on Humorality.com)

Wanted: Translator

I am being forced to learn a new language. In spite of the fact that I was born here, in spite of the fact that I have lived here all my life, I can no longer get by using my native tongue. My world has been invaded, and the invaders have changed the language. And I’m having a really hard time of it.

For example, when I was in school, cell was a term I learned in biology class. Today, that term has nothing to do with mitosis or DNA. Everywhere I go, I’m being asked to answer my cell, check my cell, turn off my cell. In the old days, a cell number only applied to those who were incarcerated. Now, everyone I know has one. Read the rest of this story . . .

Muscle Memory

The Charles Atlas cartoon-panel advertisements from my youth featured a 98-pound weakling getting sand kicked in his face by a tough beach bully. Fortunately, the puny youth signed up for Charles Atlas's body-building course, and in no time he was able to confront the bully. Unfortunately, the bully was actually Charles Atlas himself, who pounded our hero into a heap of broken bones and sore muscles. (Read More on Humorality.com)

Ten truths about motherhood

To my utter amusement, a radio interviewer recently referred to me as a "parenting expert." In spite of the fact that no such thing exists, I fastened onto that moniker and have used it to my advantage with my children.

“Clean the kitchen. It’s good for you. Remember, I’m a parenting expert.”

“No, I don’t want you going to that party, and I’m a parenting expert.”

Frankly, they aren’t impressed. Read more at New Christian Voices.

What IS Normal, Anyway?

I once heard that "normal" is only a setting on a dryer--not on humans, and I'm beginning to believe that! None of us are untouched by trials or get through life without pain of some kind. Suffering is merely one side of a coin, we each get to experience the other side of the coin as well, if we so choose--peace and contentment.

And really, if you think about it, there's no such thing as a family that ISN'T dysfunctional in some way! Some just know how to function better with the dysfunction than others.

No matter how "normal" I try to act, I realize that I am NOT normal when it comes to my health. Someone called it "handicapable" rather than "handicapped." I don't care what you call it, but it is inconvenient! Today I tried going to the post office. A rather "normal" task, right? Wrong! I had three crates of pre-stamped packages to drop off. I got the bright idea of taking my briefcase roller bag, thinking I could put one crate on TOP of the case, and use the rollers as a way to get the crate inside, allowing my other hand to hold the cane.

Since I thought I was closer to "normal" I had let my temporary handicapped parking placard expire and so I couldn't park in the handicapped parking spot. But I needed that ramp to roll the crate up to the sidewalk. So, I parked on the other side of the parking lot and had to roll the crate across the uneven surface where the cars drive through, to get to the building. Of course in the middle of the busiest spot the wheel caught a bump and the entire crate toppled over, spilling the precious cargo all around my feet. Cars had to stop because of this crazy woman in the middle of the drive, with scattered white padded packing envelopes surrounding me like spilt milk. I dropped my cane to the ground and picked up the packages, placing them back in the crate, and thought I'd try once again to make it to the door, but the roller bag crumpled under the weight.

A Good Samaritan...

Read the rest at: http://imlivingoutloud.blogspot.com/2009/09/what-is-normal-anyway.html

Kathy Carlton Willis